Grand Plan at the Kingdom by the River 4

By Peter Jimenea

I am momentarily stopping my tirades on Dok Kagaw who called up yours truly to give him time to correct his mistakes.

But I am resuming my brickbats on Hydrocephallus, a key agent in Oplan Pagbag-o at the Kingdom by the River whose main agenda is to pave the way for the entrance of Bigboy, called “Grand Plan” by Hydrocephallus and his Jijimon reporters.

The Grand Plan is premised on the scenario that King Tura is ill, very ill and that he might not finish his term.

Hydrocephallus should know that King Tura is very much healthy and he and his Jijimons are only courting disaster if they continue with their game plan of throwing their weight around and egging out those perceived to be against his bossing Bigboy.

Yours truly is very much aware that Hydrocephallus had gone to the palace of King Tura and tipped off the latter who were the “traitors” at the Kingdom by the River. My friend Zarbo, seated away within hearing distance, blurted at him straight face: “Ano gid ginbulig mo kay King Tura sg eleksyon, haw? Wala mo gani napadaug tatay mo...” (“What help did you really extended to King Tura? You even failed to make your own father win...”) His poor father ran and lost for the municipal council of Airport Town last May.  

Zarbo's remark was like a dynamite that blasted right on Hydrocephallus’s nose who grinned and turned away. Zarbo is Lazaro Borongan, a hard hitting broadcaster in Iloilo.

Hydrocephallus in the last elections worked for Long Legs. He landed in the Kingdom by the River after the elections due to the endorsement of Bigman and Bigboy, giants of the south, who based their favourable recommendation on the information fed by Jijimon Mutya.

The Kingdom by the River is still in a state of trance since July last year. Long standing procurement contracts, done last year yet, are not delivered yet. The team leading Oplan Pagbag-o has erected too much bureaucratic gridlocks. Almost all hospitals have no medicines and supplies because bureaucratic mazes bound the hands of winning contractors from delivering. Even the clinic at the second floor of the Kingdom by the River is plague by the same malaise of lack of medicine.

The only palpable sign of pagbag-o is Hydrocephallus usurping powers and functions not his and is still scheming more sinister plots to expand his powers and functions notwithstanding his ineptitude and lack of formal qualification.

His first job was to head the Kawkaw division. Since August that he was the head thereof, he can’t even point to a single program he planned and achievement attained by the office under his leadership. But he still has the gall to bump off and usurp the rank, position, power and function of Ma’am Malou, a competent information officer. Question: since Hydrocephallus usurped the power and function of Ma’am Malou in December, can he point to a single press release or feature story written by his own hands, that promotes and protects the image of the kingdom and its king?

As far as this writer is concerned, all that Hydrocephallus can point to as “achievement” are the articles he copied verbatim for which he was sanctioned with dismissal from a national broadsheet.

Through his machination, he became “head” of a super-office from the combined radio, Kawkaw and information divisions, a position that he illegally seized and for which he is unqualified to head because he holds only a BS degree, not master’s as required.

But we don’t know when he would relent from his megalomanic onslaught. He still wants to expand his powers and illegally. He is now working to dismember the planning office of its evaluation section which stores and analyzes data and the center of its IT development; he still wants to seize the school board with P100 million funding, and the disaster mitigation program with P60 million. Not contented,  this incompetent but overly ambitious slob further schemes to rob the general services office of its function to publicize notices for biddings. (To be continued)